Monday, June 20, 2011

Residency and the worst ideas ever...

Ananth started residency today. I am feeling better already, mostly because I'm not dreading it starting anymore. Now I'm just living in it. For example, I will not see my wonderful boyfriend until Friday... or maybe Saturday... or maybe not. Nothing is absolute anymore. However, I am confident that I will not see him this week, so instead of dreading next week, I can put my efforts into working hard this week, so that this weekend I can focus on moving out of my apartment and hopefully seeing my boyfriend. So this is easier than last week. I don't feel like crying every moment.

There are bad ideas that accompany missing your boyfriend. For example (it's an examply kind of day): Facebook stalking him. Today I learned that all of the women my boyfriend has been in a relationship with since 2006 were gorgeous blondes. Note to the blogger world: I am not a gorgeous blond. And I'm a little fat. I am generally not the girl that feel unworthy or less beautiful. I am very pretty. And I have lots of great qualities. And my boyfriend picked me. I know he likes me. etc. But I will admit, I've never questioned my own beauty more than I am today after finding out just how pretty my boyfriend's ex's are. I am not upset. And I don't want to cry. Really I just feel ridiculous. And stupid. I did this to myself. It was admittedly a very bad idea.

Worse still than the idea to facebook stalk my boyfriend and by extension his ex girlfriends, is the idea to take in my father for a few weeks while his apartment gets ready. My father has put down a deposit on a place, and will eventually get in, but probably not until the beginning of July. So my very alcoholic, ornery, and sometime just down right obnoxious father is going to stay with me. While I pack and move. Did I mention that I work from home?

Overall I really want it to be like July 7th. On July 7th, it will be almost my birthday (and incidentally my sister in laws birthday), my father won't be here anymore, and I will be (hopefully) used to not seeing my boyfriend for weeks on end. Oh. And I will be in my new apartment.

PS I am pretty sure my boyfriend is getting me a Wii for my birthday. He really needs to work on this whole "surprise" thing. I love surprises. He is very bad at them.

No comments: